After leaving The Netherlands and now living in Salento for almost five years, I have come to realize something unexpected about the expat journey — something that doesn’t often get talked about. This isn’t my first time living abroad. Before this, next to long term projects abroad, I was based in Jakarta, Indonesia on a professional assignment.
That phase of expat life had a clear structure, purpose, and timeline. It was shaped by work and achieving goals in a business-to-business environment. Logistics, and the practicalities of my relocation were practically taken care of by the company I represented. I could focus right away on my business assignment and how to adapt to the Indonesian culture and working environment. Challenging enough.
´´¨I am not building a life from scratch anymore. I am living it.
That's where a new phase began, one that I didn't fully expect ¨
Italy has been different. This move was personal, a private settling into a new chapter of life. And like many expats, the early phase of moving to a new country is often intense; navigating unfamiliar systems, building new relationships, learning a language, adapting to a different culture, building routines, and slowly creating a sense of home. It was a time of big change and big effort.
Then, after years of settling in, feeling at home, grounded in Salento, Puglia, something shifted. Quietly. There was no big event. No crisis. Just a gradual realization:
"I am not building a life from scratch anymore. I’m living it."
That’s when a new phase began, one that I didn’t fully expect.
Once everything felt familiar, when daily life was no longer a challenge, priorities shift, new questions began to arise:
Am I still on the right path, or just following momentum
What does purpose look like beyond just “settling in”?
What does growth look like for me now?
What goals still matter and which ones have changed?
¨Because even in stability there is a need for renewal.
Sometimes that means stepping back to reflect¨
These are not always easy questions. In fact, they can be uncomfortable, especially when everything on the surface seems “fine.” But they are important. Because even in stability, there is a need for renewal. Sometimes, that means stepping back to reflect. Other times, it means taking new risks, pursuing different passions, or reconnecting with values that may have gotten lost along the way. This stage of the expat journey is subtle, but deeply important. It’s not about surviving or adjusting anymore. It’s about redefining. And that can be just as complex as the initial move.
Whether you’re a professional expat on assignment, a solo expat exploring independence, a long-term resident wondering about your next step, or even a new expat just starting out, know that this quiet shift may already have begun or may come one day.
Can you relate to this? I’d love to hear your story! Feel free to contact me…
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